literature

Toilet Turmoil

Deviation Actions

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Published:
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Literature Text

Can't hold it any longer
the train is in the station
I have to find a place
Or my pants will not stay dry.

Nearest girls room at 20 paces
I enter and swing open the first door
Looking down,
Something was not flushed here.

Moving on to the next
Where closer examination reveals
One small, short, and curly
Chillin' on the toilet seat.

Stall smells like old tuna fish
Toilet appears to be clean but
Stains on floor are dissuading.
Bathroom Gonorrhea? I'll pass.

In frustration, and impatience
I kick the next door
Large lady holding newspaper
Don't you know these things have locks!?

Bloody tampon: Get out of this stall
You'll never sway me to join you
Sanitary bin: Needs to be used.
Fuck you Tampax Girl.

Neon goo clings to white seat:
Appears to be giving off toxic fumes
My life story will not read:
"Death by toilet radiation"

Finally, Seat clean.
Nothing in bowl.
It even flushes with ease.
My sanctuary is found.

Relief washes over me
As I turn to lock the door.
Mall bathroom I have defeated thee.

Alas: No toilet paper.
Whenever you need it most:
You can never find a clean toilet.

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Comments23
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Thatguylikesfarts's avatar
No toilet paper? Sucks to be you.